No, no, there's nobody else, I mean... well there was that one time I tried blogger, but really there's nobody else I swear. I mean, Twitter doesn't count right? That's micro-blogging, that's not even a thing. It doesn't mean anything to me.
Look, all I'm trying to say is that you deserve better. I thought I could change, but now I just don't know. I want you to have all the things you deserve, like timely updates, witty banter, humorous yet poignant anecdotes. Otherwise we're just kidding ourselves by going through the motions, right?
So, you know, maybe it's best if I move out for a while? We gave this thing a shot. Nobody can say we didn't try. Sure, sometimes I felt like I was the only one trying but we all have our ups and downs. I thought I could spice things up with a new typeface and a fancy template, but who was I trying to kid?
I know this is a shock to you, in a lot of ways it's a shock to me too. Believe me, the last thing I want to do is hurt you but we have to be real. Our story isn't going to write itself. We both have to work at it, you know?
Even if.... what's that? I can still Twitter and be with you? At the same time? At the same time? I mean, not just like one time on my birthday, right? Any time?
Baby, I take it all back. I love you. I'm never going to let you go. The three of us are going places! See you soon!