waffle on
Grocery shopping is always a bit of a challenge — you have to deal with the old ladies in the checkout line that insist on taking 10 minutes to write out a check, the wonky-wheel shopping cart that never seems to steer right, and I won't even mention the perils of the organic aisle. But, during my weekly grocery trip this weekend I ran into a new nemesis...


I never really noticed before but there is an obscenely large selection of frozen waffles in our grocery store. First let's deal with flavors. You've got your standard and buttermilk of course (aside, I can't really tell the difference between the two). Then there's the novelty flavors like strawberry, chocolate chip and piña colada. On top of that, we can't forget about the nutri-grain, whole wheat and low-calorie versions. So far so good.

Then I noticed the box sizes. I'm fairly certain there used to be at most two options. Recently I have noticed that there are no less than four different options for quantity: 12, 24, 48 and 60. And to add insult to injury I also have to decide between brand name and store-brand.

By my calculations that leaves me with no less than 78,215 different choices. Of waffles. Is this really necessary? I can't take it. I want to be able to walk into the frozen-food aisle and just pick up a box of waffles. I don't want to have to perform a complex cost-benefit analysis comparing the price of the 60-count generic strawberry waffles vs. the 48 count Eggo buttermilk. Seriously. And don't even get me started on the analysis of future value of lost-wages caused by consuming too many piña colada flavor breakfast disks.

So, I'm taking a stand. From now on I'm just sticking to the 24 count Eggo Original. No more spending 30 minutes in front of the freezer case poring over my options. I'm also slashing the tires on the cart of any old lady that tries to cut in front of me with her check book.